Lacking Both Sense AND Sensibility

I am ever mindful of my absence from ‘blogging’. In addition to my usual comings and goings, I learned first-hand about a little something the medical community affectionately (or ‘infectionately’) refers to as Lyme Disease. Despite the name, it is not refreshing, nor is it enjoyable on a hot summer day. Two weeks of antibiotics and I felt human once again. Still looked like hell, but felt human. Celebrated the end of my treatment the only way I could – with a Raspberry flavoured slushie (The store was all out of Lime L ).

Enough with the loathing and self-pity, and on with the show!

Okay, so this weekend my lovely wife and adorable daughter were watching a BBC adaptation of “Sense and Sensibility” (You can tell when a Jane Austen themed program is being viewed in Casa Cameron that Sunday afternoon ‘decompression’ is taking place).

Now, anyone who knows me knows that I can’t let more than ten minutes go by without some pithy and topical (ridiculous) comment pass my lips. This time, however, it was my darling daughter who pointed out that David Morrissey of ‘The Walking Dead’ was in this show, and then made a joke about zombies lurking about. Given that someone actually has written books combining Jane Austen with the aforementioned undead, it seemed like a wholly legitimate observation.

Of course, in that scene was Dominic Cooper, so I naturally had to ask “Hey, what’s Howard Stark doing there?” This elicited two reactions – laughter from my daughter, and a look from my wife that usually says “This is regular TV, so I can’t pause it like Netflix until you knuckleheads pipe down” or something like that.

We remained silent, biting our lips, until the next scene when Sloane and I both noticed that the man in the powdered wig loudly slurping soup was none other than Ron Weasley’s dad. I observed that it was nice to see that his job in the Ministry of Magic allowed him enough to move his family into a bigger house.

Brief moments later, after I was banished to the basement rec room, I got thinking about this and thought to myself “Myself – this could be a fun game!”

Imagine you’re pitching a movie – except it’s already been done, and you don’t alter the name or the story. You even keep the same actors who were in the original.

The difference is that you change the characters to a name / role that the actor played elsewhere.

The ‘rules’ would be as follows:

1.       Pitches are no more than 700 words long (or verbally no longer than the time it takes to be banned from the living room);

2.       Pitches must relate to an existing movie or television program;

3.       Casting must include the actual actors / actresses who were in the production

4.       You are allowed to adjust the plot (but not too much!) in order to fit the new characters together

So here’s my challenge to you – write your own and post it in the comment section below. Who knows – we might get enough to start a new blog on its own!  Obviously, it goes without saying that you should sign your name to it – we should all receive the credit / notoriety we richly deserve!

Even if you feel guilty by tampering with someone’s art, take solace in the fact that we live in an age of multiple ‘reboots’, and where some people believe you can go from zero to hero by adding a few explosions and maybe an oversized robot…or two.

To get the ball rolling, I’ll give one right now:

 

‘PRIDE AND PREJUDICE (2005)’

Revised Cast:

Keira Knightley – change ‘Elizabeth Bennet’ to ‘Elizabeth Swann’ (her character in the Pirates of the Caribbean movies)

Matthew Macfadyen – change ‘Mr. Darcy’ to ‘Tom Quinn’ (his character in the BBC spy drama ‘MI-5)

Tom Hollander – change ‘Mr. Collins’ to ‘Cutler Beckett’ (his character in the Pirates of the Caribbean movies)

Rosamund Pike – change ‘Jane Bennet’ to ‘Miranda Frost’ (her character in the 007 movie ‘Die Another Day’)

Donald Sutherland - change ‘Mr. Bennet’ to…what else - Kiefer Sutherland’s (Jack Bauer’s) dad!

New  Pitch:

“Young Elizabeth Swann escapes the clutches of Captain Jack Sparrow and returns to England. On her trail is her nemesis, Cutler Beckett, who followed her from the Caribbean and is intent to have his way.

Lucky for her, she captures the attention of MI-5 agent Tom Quinn, who is hot on the trail of double agent Miranda Frost, who happens to share a flat with Swann. In defeating both Beckett and Frost, Elizabeth Swann falls in love with Quinn and agrees to marry him.

In the absence of the Governor, her guardian - Jack Bauer's dad - gives consent.”

 

Enjoy!